HEAD AND TAILS

We have come to associate the evening meal of Rosh Hashanah with apples and honey. This sugary combination is eaten as a good omen for a sweet new year. Despite its universal appeal among Jews of all stripes, this customary dish is not mentioned in the Talmudic passage (Horayot 12a and Keritot 6a) that discusses the types of foods one should consume on the evening of the New Year. Instead, we find mention of gourds, fenugreek, leeks and dates. Some of these foods are sweet, symbolising a sweet new year; others are abundant, hinting at a year of prosperity, and others have names that allude to an increase in our performance of mitzvoth or the destruction of our enemies. Over time, more foods whose names, even if in the vernacular, hint to a year of sweetness, prosperity or protection from harm were added. Thus, for example, many Jews eat carrots, whose Yiddish name mehren, also means ‘to increase’. There is a custom to eat the head of a sheep or fish, or other animal or bird (Tur and Shulchan Orach Chaim 583:2 and see the Magen Avraham ad loc). The sheep brings to mind the Akeidat Yitzchak, the binding of Isaac that occurred on Rosh Hashanah. A ram was substituted for the patriarch and to this day, we ideally use a ram’s horn for a shofar to recall the merit of Avraham who passed this trial. Fish are abundant creatures and by serving them at the meal, we are making a subtle request of God to increase our offspring like the fish of the sea (see Bereishit 48:16). 

The prayer that is said when consuming the sheep or fish head is: “May it be Your will, Hashem, our God and the God of our forefathers, that we be as the head and not as the tail.” The source for this short prayer is a verse from our parsha (Devarim 28:13): “Hashem shall place you as a head and not as a tail; you shall be only above and you shall not be below – if you hearken to the commandments of Hashem, your God, that I command you today, to observe and to perform.” If we follow the mitzvoth of the Torah we are assured a place of prominence like the head in relation to the rest of the body. The Aramaic translation of Onkelos renders these words: “God will make you strong and not weak”, whereas Ramban explains: “You will be the head of all the nations and not the tail of even one of them for it is possible to be the head of many nations and yet still be of lesser importance than the tail of one particular nation.” He was obviously bothered by the redundancy of the verse – for if you are promised to be the head, there is no need to state that you will not be the tail. His second interpretation is, “You will be the head from now and not the tail, forevermore, in any time or epoch.” Unfortunately, the Nation of Israel has not always lived up to its holy mandate and the result of this is a long exile in which it has more often been the tail than the head. I have felt this most profoundly since 7^th October 2023. Jews, in general, and the State of Israel, in particular, have been relegated to a position of “pariah people.” They have been vilified and accused of genocide and other war crimes. At the recent Rabbinical Conference, respected political analyst Dr Frans Cronje praised our Chief Rabbi for his hard-hitting videos in which he took on, headfirst, the libellous claims made against Israel. Dr Cronje stated that the ANC was fully prepared to scapegoat the Jewish people and blame them for its failures. It was only due to the pushback from the Chief Rabbi that it rolled back its scheme! I felt very uplifted by this. It was a powerful example of how a strong leader was not prepared to accept that Jews be treated as tails!  

Surprisingly, there is a directive from the Sages that we should strive to be a tail and not a head! This is found in Pirkei Avot (4:15): “Rabbi Matya ben Charash said…be a tail to lions and do not be a head to foxes.” The Vilna Gaon associates this advice with a verse in Proverbs (Mishlei 13:20): “One who walks with the wise will grow wise, but the companion (roeh) of fools will be broken (yaroa).” The word roeh is understood by most of the commentators to refer to a friend or companion as in v’ahavta lreiacha kamocha, love your friend as yourself. The final word of the verse, yaroa, is translated as “to be broken” or “crushed”. The Gaon, however, has a novel interpretation. He reads roeh as a shepherd, or a leader, and yaroa as ‘to become wicked’, hence: the leader of fools will become wicked like them. He explains: “[the meaning of this verse] is as our sages said, “Be a tail to lions and not a head to foxes.” This is what is meant by “one who walks with the wise”, that is, secondary to them and attached to them. He sits in the dust of their feet and as a result, he too becomes wise, for he hears words of wisdom from them and observes their ways, and it is the way of a person to be influenced in his character and deeds by the people he associates with. But he who is the shepherd, the head and leader of the foolish, for whom turning from evil is abominable, he too will become evil like them.” 

We cannot and should not underestimate the influence of our peer group, be it at school, at the workplace and even at shul. The people we spend a great deal of time with are going to influence us and therefore it behooves us to seek out upright, moral and righteous individuals to associate with, even if it means that we will be their subordinates. This is not an exaggeration. How many times have parents come to my office to complain about the “group that my child hangs out with” and the effect they are having on him/her? Entire lives are made – or broken – when one either follows or ignores this sage advice.

The influence of peers can be direct, but it can also be subtle. Even if a person does not join in the unsavoury behaviour of the group he is associated with, the mere fact that he spends time with them can be damaging, as this comment of our sages on the above verse illustrates (Pirkei d’Rebbi Eliezer chapter 25): “One who walks with the wise will grow wise” – to what may this matter be compared? To someone who enters a perfumery, even though he does not buy anything, he emerges with a fragrant aroma, so too one who walks with the wise, absorbs from their [positive] ways and good deeds. “But the companion of fools will be broken” – to what may this matter be compared? To someone who enters a tannery. Even though he does not purchase anything, he emerges with a pungent odour. Likewise, he who walks with the wicked will take from their ways and their bad deeds.” The same Midrash cites the example of a biblical character – Lot – who benefitted from his association with the righteous Avraham, even though he later parted ways with the patriarch: “One who walks with the wise will grow wise” – this refers to Lot, who travelled with our father Avraham and learned from his deeds and good ways. What did Avraham do? He made a guesthouse on the way to the city of Charan.  Whoever arrived or left Charan would be welcomed by Avraham and would be given food and drink. Avraham would use the opportunity to teach them about the One God. When Lot went to Sodom he did likewise. When the people of Sodom outlawed hospitality, he continued to look after guests in the dark of night [when it was less dangerous].” It is fair to say that Lot’s hospitality to the angels who came to destroy the wicked town stood him in good stead and saved him from a terrible death. His association with a righteous person had long-term, life-changing benefits.

Choose you friends and mentors with discretion and wisdom. They could save your life – or destroy it.

Lee, Chani Merryl & Naomi join me in wishing you Shabbat Shalom.  

Rabbi Liebenberg.

Rabbi’s YouTube message: https://youtu.be/n3fnr5p7z40